Chocolate Chocolate Chip Cookies: AKA Meltdown Cookies

It’s been about three months since the world in Los Angeles has partially reopened. However, if you ask me, it feels like it’s already been an eternity. It’s been almost all kitchen and no mortician and I am more burned out than the tiny cremated remains that get stuck in the crevice of the retort. If you don’t know what I am talking about there it may be better you don’t think too hard on that comparison. If you are unlucky enough to be a server/entrepreneur extraordinaire then chances are you are in the same sad sad beat down boat I am right now. Guests in restaurants are awful. Masks and vax is a political hot spot that you are put in between as a lowly subordinate server who’s money depends on not pissing your guests off when they discuss how Gavin Newsome destroyed the economy and they don’t know how they’ll recover but you know for a fact they were not unemployed all year given they are about to drop $35 on a glass of wine and $68 on some fish and $5 for your tip because they are soooo concerned for the working class. It was only natural that at some point I was going to have a complete and utter meltdown. I had zero human interaction for a year and then was slingshot back into a job I had desperately trying to exit with guests who were more ungrateful and awful than I could have ever imagined them being. So one bright Saturday I came in to work after 13 hours the day before, knowing I had 13 more to go for saturday and then another 10 hours to work on Sunday, I broke. In fairness I’ve thrown far worse tantrums but usually they are in the walkin (of a restaurant or mortuary as they do the same thing, keep things from decomposing).

So if you are like me and on the verge of a total meltdown let’s take a deep breath and make some cookies, sure it’s not going to solve everything, but you may just feel right as rain-for a little while-after you eat one.

Ingredients

• 1 Egg Replacer

  • You can use a couple different products, Ener-G, Flax Seed, Bob’s Redmill. Just follow the directions on the bag to use what you need for the equivalent of one egg.

• 3/4 cup nondairy butter

• 1/2 cup firmly packed brown sugar

• 1/2 cup granulated white sugar

• 1 teaspoon vanilla extract

• 1/2 teaspoon chocolate extract (optional but enhances the recipe greatly!)

• 1 1/2 cups all-purpose flour

• 1/4 cup unsweetened cocoa

• 1 teaspoon baking soda

• 1/4 teaspoon salt

• 1 cup nondairy chocolate chips

Directions

1. Preheat oven to 350° F.

2. Line two cookie sheets with parchment paper or use 2 non-stick cookie sheets.

3. In a small bowl white the egg replacer powder with water, until it’s thick and creamy and then set aside.

4. Cream the butter and sugars together or with an electric hand mixer at high speed.

5. Beat in the egg replacer mixture with the vanilla and chocolate extract.

6. In a separate bowl combine the flour, cocoa, baking soda, and salt.

7. Add to the butter mixture along with the chocolate chips.

8. Stir well until combined, but do not overstir.

9. Drop by rounded teaspoons onto the cookie sheet.

10. Bake 10 to 12 minutes or until golden brown.

11. Remove the cookies from the sheet immediately after baking and cool on a wire rack.