The Community of ‘The Perpetual Flame’
The Perpetual Flame
A Death Positive Community
Are you looking for a welcoming and inclusive community that celebrates the diversity of all humans?
And just to be clear-and to add some humor-no, this isn’t a cult.
To all my friends that thought, “yessss Amber has started a cult,” I am so so so sorry to disappoint you, but this is a real honest to God, community project.
Well, then welcome to The Perpetual Flame. I created this-hopefully nationwide-community organization with the intent to serve anyone and everyone who will eventually eat or die. If that sounds like you, then you have come to the right place!
I have created this as a non-profit with the sole intent of providing death education to everyone, regardless of their background, belief, or lifestyle. One of the best parts of being a mortician was being allowed to share in the lives of so many people I never would have met in a normal world, and I feel that I owe it to everyone I have served to pass on the knowledge and love I gained from my decade in the funeral world.
So, I created this “community”, for anyone who feels that they have been left out or left behind from the mainstream community organizations. For anyone who wants a safe space to discuss mortality and how they feel they fit into this world for the brief time we get to be here.
I want to light this flame for you. And I will do my best to keep it burning.
Why Join The Perpetual Flame?
I have worked for over a decade to create this death positive safe space, but I can’t do it alone. Death, like birth, takes a village to care and tend to.
All I can do is share my light with you and give you the tools to make your own community better.
Membership is always free, but if you feel inclined, you can support my Patreon to help fuel my podcasts and videos, and go to fund my not for profit conservation park I’m helping to build in Washington!
What are the Tenets of The Perpetual Flame?
True to my libra nature, you are welcome to take what works for you, and leave what doesn’t resonate. You can meditate on what you love, what feels hollow, and I hope that you find the activities that work for you. I have chosen food, because that’s what speaks to me and that’s how I feel I can best communicate with you.
The Perpetual Flame believes…
Basic
That food can illustrate the relationships we have as humans to saints, martyrs, and general religious practices. To know and understand how it does this, allows us to love and understand the similarities, rather than differences among us.
Intermediate
That food is an anthropological and sociological exploration. Food, unbeknownst to us, forms our cultural identity. Understanding this is a pathway to appreciating others, rather than leaning on culturally taught fears of “the other”.
Intermediate
That food allows us to renegotiate our relationship with the dead in a world where they are no longer present.
Intermediate
That food can act as a form of release be it through creating or eating. And that loving food, and the act of eating and cooking, put us closer in touch with our humanity, our place in the universe, and thus at ease with our mortality.
Basic
That in a world with ever changing linguistics. Where words meant to unite, divide. Food can act as language we all understand.
Intermediate
That food can act as a way to create continuing bonds with the dead by creating recipes that honor our deceased loved ones.
Advanced
That food has become both symbolic and literally a causation in preventing, prolonging, or causing death.
What is The Death Positive Movement and what are the tenets?
You may be familiar with Caitlin Doughty and The Order of the Good Death. If you didn’t know, I helped create the flagship mortuary Undertaking LA.
Like all little birds I had to eventually find my own way, and my non-profit is a nod to all the hard work I put into helping create that branch of The Order. The Perpetual Flame is my answer to finding ways to get you more involved. My background is in Volunteer Coordination and this is the role that really makes me feel alive and useful. So it would only make sense that my next chapter would be to find a way to nurture each and every amazing human that feels they want to find a way to make a difference too!
These tenets are from Caitlin’s site and they are perfect. I also acknowledge the good her organization has done and do not wish to alter the language that so many wonderful humans have learned to love.
Basic
I believe that the dead body is not dangerous, and that everyone should be empowered (should they wish to be) to be involved in care for their own dead.
Intermediate
I believe that the laws that govern death, dying and end-of-life care should ensure that a person’s wishes are honored, regardless of sexual, gender, racial or religious identity.
Intermediate
I believe that my family and friends should know my end-of-life wishes, and that I should have the necessary paperwork to back-up those wishes.
Advanced
I believe that my death should be handled in a way that does not do great harm to the environment.
Intermediate
I believe that my open, honest advocacy around death can make a difference, and can change culture.
Basic
I believe that by hiding death and dying behind closed doors we do more harm than good to our society.
Intermediate
I believe that the culture of silence around death should be broken through discussion, gatherings, art, innovation, and scholarship.
Advanced
I believe that talking about and engaging with my inevitable death is not morbid, but displays a natural curiosity about the human condition.